Since the last few days this topic has been itching on my head to write. There are so many events in our lives but few leave a strong mark don’t they.
Our driver anna passed away recently. He was with us for the past 3 years and was a very loving, sincere guy. He was more like family to us. He took care of my mom really well during her everyday rides and so did she for him with all his commitments. But due to heavy loans that his wife had taken he was always under financial pressure. The wife could not manage the situation and suddenly committed suicide a month ago. This itself was too shocking for all of us and him. She left behind a son and our driver anna was still struggling to manage the situation all alone. We supported him in many ways financially, mentally, food etc and he truly was committed to move on with his life for the sake of his son. He had also moved his son to a better school and paid the admission fees too. Due to school holidays his son was with the grandparents for a few weeks and our driver anna was all alone at home.
He had taken two days leave because he was unwell and had fever. He obviously had no one at home to help or support him. What all can go on in our minds when we are feeling lonely? It’s a devils workplace then!! He committed suicide and died, just forgetting everything else life is ready to offer and more than anything his son who has only him as support.
Loneliness kills is not just a phrase for the sake of it, its very true.
I also know an old couple who are majorly depressed due to loneliness and for this couple they don’t stay alone, they live with their son, daughter-in-law and grandchild. So how are they still lonely?
It’s a state of mind.
How do we ensure that we are not lonely?
Talk.. Talk and Talk
Be social. Have those few people whom you trust and are able to talk to freely.
Do not judge. We may have had many experiences in the past and would have crossed many hurdles but the present might be different. Do not judge it and just enjoy the moment.
Be present. All we have with us is the current moment. Past is gone and the future is yet to come. By putting energy on either we only stand to lose what we have which is the NOW!
Be mindful. Mindfulness practice every day can be extremely helpful in keeping the mind in a calmer state.
Have fun. Nothing remains the same, the good might change and so does the bad. Hence have fun with everything that happens to you.
Trust life. Life is all about doing. Do something that can make you happy everyday and trust that you are happy, trust life.
Reach out. If you still feel the need to work with someone, reach out to a professional mental health person and get it sorted out. Do not let this slip into a bigger trouble for yourself.
These are just few things but there can be many things that can keep your mind calm and composed. Keep remembering that we attract what we believe in, so even with people around us, if we believe we are alone we might land up with loneliness!!